You lose your keys, your glasses, the last piece of bacon-its a tragic experience! And you look all over for it. Try as you might, you just can't find it anywhere. It is that awful feeling-that feeling that you will never sleep again for fear that you and your treasured item will be pulled farther and farther away from each other.
Isn't that the worst?
And then of course when you DO find it, someone will inevitably say that age old adage (which yes I did just look up to make sure I was using that word properly) 'Its always in the last place you look!' You will of course think to yourself, 'Thanks idiot, who in their right mind would keep looking after they found what they were looking for?' but on the outside you say, 'I know!' and bat your eye lashes and hope that they don't see through your desire to slap them.
But the point of my story is that you always find things in the darndest places. My mom used to lose her glasses all the time (pre lasic eye surgery) and would find them...on top of her head.
Enter point of this post.
I have been pondering and stressing over a decision and some situations in my life for a few months. Stressing because of course matters of the heart are always so dark and twisty and complicated and pondering because, well, matters of the heart are meant to be pondered. You don't need to know the specifics of it, but needless to say I was really wanting to figure it all out. I had prayed about it, I had thought it out in my mind, and still, nothing. It was driving me insane. So late Saturday night after a much needed conversation, I started a fast to figure it out.
Now I don't talk about my calling very often on here, but I am ward party planner. It used to be my dream calling, but right now it is the number one adder of stress to my life. It is so hard to plan for things in my ward where one week we will have 20 people at something and the next week 30-50. UGH! So we had an awesome sacrament meeting, great Sunday School and then I assumed my position in the kitchen (spare me the bare foot and pregnant jokes) and go about making baked potatoes for everyone...due to some slight miscalculations I was stressed all afternoon so I didn't really break my fast properly and I wasn't really in any mood to receive revelation or answers. Looking back, I would have probably had a hard time deciphering answers at that time anyways. I went home that night and took a breather before going to party it up watching the Super Bowl at a friend's house.
This is me in the kitchen being stressed...and taking a picture. It makes sense.
Post Half Time, mid-sentence, the spirit slapped that answer in my face so hard. The funny thing was, it had been staring me in the face for WEEKS, but I guess I just needed the right perspective. Well there it was, BOOM, perspective. And once I knew, there was nothing that could have stopped me from doing the right thing, so I did it.
I am so glad to have the gift of personal revelation, and especially for the Holy Ghost. I don't always recognize it, I don't always know when I'm following it, but I'm trying.
Besides, its always in the last place you look.